Cossover of DOOM OLD SHAME
by The Nerd of All Cosmos
Summary: This is a RP HufflepuffNinja and I once did. NO LONGER ADDING TO BECAUSE I LOST THE FILES
1. Chapter 1 Bactine and Brainfreezys

Crossover of DOOM

Ch.1; Bactine and Brainfreezys.

AN; This is based on (read; copy and pasted from) the Rp my friend (Hufflepuff Ninja) are doing. 90% of the credit goes to her. I do not own JtHM, Portal or Invader Zim. Only the great Jhonen Vasquez owns JtHM and IZ, and Valve owns Portal. I do not own Bunny Must Die, either. Don't know who does, though. Hufflepuff Ninja is Johnny, and, later on, Dib. I am my OC, Arethia, GLaDOS and some other non-important characters.

"Take that you bony-ass freaAARRGHH!"  
"Speak up, I can't hear you over your death-screech."  
The knife clattered to the floor, glittering slightly in the dull light as its former wielder wiped a bony hand across his cheek.  
"I gotta give it to him, though, he was feisty for a party clown. Scratched me up pretty good." He bent down to pick up the blood-soaked knife, shaking off the excess and storing it carefully in his black bag. "Covered in blood. Some of it mine, this is a familiar situation." He sighed, heading for the steps up to the main level of his house. He passed a cracked mirror on his way out the door. He didn't bother looking at his reflection, he knew what he'd see. He'd see a man of about twenty-three, tall and exceedingly thin, the back of his head shaved, leaving a shock of messy dark hair on top of his head, he'd see deep-set, dark eyes, dark circles under them from months without sleep. He'd see his overly-long t-shirt with its ever-changing slogan, his distinctive steel-tipped boots. He'd see a mass murderer, a raving lunatic on bad days, an intelligent raving lunatic on good days. He shot a glance out a nearby window at his neighbor's house. He would normally visit little Squee to borrow Bactine, but he'd used the last of it not too long ago. He doubted there would be more. He would go to a drugstore, but it was three AM, they would all be closed. He sighed, the only other option was to raid some other house. Oh well, he had been meaning to take a walk. He walked out the door, watching as a newspaper skipped down the sidewalk, carried by the slight breeze. He pinned it down with his boot, reading the headline: "Officials Estimate Mystery Murderer Kill Count Up to 3,500, Public Paralyzed By Fear" He smirked at the paper. 3,500? He had really killed that many? As for the public being in a panic, well that was complete bullshit. They were just as oblivious as always, content to go about their shallow lives. He picked a chunk of houses across the street, played a quick round of eeny-meeny-miney-moe, and slipped easily through one of the front windows of the house he chose, unwisely left slightly open. He found the bathroom quickly and yanked open the medicine cabinet, rummaging through it and not caring that he was making a ruckus.

Red eyes silently watched from a tree, staring at the sleeping form of Dib Membrane. He looked so peaceful, so cute with his scythe-hair thing. Arehtia sighed. Their love would never last, or start, for that matter. You see, Arehtia wasn't human. She was Irken. Irkens are supposed to be relatively emotionless, only feeling anger and hate. But Arehtia was different. She could feel every emotion. She kept it a secret from the Empire, for fear of being declared a Defective. At Skool, she couldn't help but stare at him longingly from the back of the room. Because of this, she often got extra homework, but her S.I.R, Innovator always took care of it for her. Besides being a student, she worked part-time at the local Cosplay Cafe'. The theme was that of a game called 'Bunny Must Die', Arehtia cosplaying as Bunny. She often got stares and wolf whistles from the male patrons, but she only had eyes for Dib.  
Hearing a large crash, her Invader instincts kicked in before she had time to think.


	2. Chapter 2 Stuff

Crossover of DOOM

Ch.2;

A/N; I do not own JtHM, Portal or Invader Zim. Only the great Jhonen Vasquez does. Once again, Hufflepuff Ninja is Johnny, and, later on, Dib. I am my OC, Arethia, GLaDOS and some other non-important characters.

* * *

Johnny scanned the last bottle in the medicine cabinet, and threw it to the ground in frustration. No Bactine. Not a drop. He swore under his breath and looked around. This was a fairly large house; there was probably another bathroom, most likely upstairs. He slammed the bathroom door behind him, evidently missing the whole 'be-quiet-when-breaking-into-a-house' concept and stomped up the stairs, searching briefly and finally finding another bathroom right next to Dib's bedroom. He yanked open the cabinet above the sink and began searching, once again, for some disinfectant.

* * *

Arethia leaped out of the tree, using her Spider Legs to break her fall. She landed with a soft 'whump', and snuck around the side of the house. Using one of her spy-scopes, she took a look around the living room. Nothing was stolen, so it couldn't be robbers, she thought. A stray newspaper flitted across on the breeze, eventually landing in a hedge. She always grabbed a copy for the crossword, and, seeing as she hadn't gotten her paycheck yet, decided that a free newspaper wasn't a bad idea. It was when she grabbed it that she saw the headline. Automatically assuming the worst, Arehtia leaped into the house, and silently stormed up the stairs, breaking into Dib's room, to check if he was still alive. Relieved that he was unharmed, she set about her business to find who had broken the integrity of the Membrane household.


	3. Chapter 3 MOAR STUFF!

Crossover of DOOM

Ch.3

Johnny whirled around at the sound of Arehtia passing by, a tube of toothpaste clutched in his hand. He stood there for a moment before dismissing it as the house settling, or some other harmless noise. He turned back to the cabinet and finally found what he was looking for. He unscrewed the top and spread the disinfectant on his wounds, leaning against the kitchen sink and wincing. "Fook, why does it have to sting so bad," he hissed through gritted teeth, "As if getting injured in the first place wasn't enough."

After placing a security drone near Dib's alarm clock, Arehtia put on her ninja outfit and gear, so she did not alarm the intruder, whoever he/she was. {They're probably in the bathroom} she thought to herself.  
She slowly left Dib's room, and carefully snuck down the hall, towards the bathroom. Her antennae flattened against her head, the left one twitching slightly. Using some suction cups, she climbed up the wall, and sneaked a peek into the bathroom. There, leaning against the sink, was a tall, skeleton-like man, who was rubbing some form of disinfectant on himself. She thanked the powers that be that the intruder hadn't harmed Dib. Taking a blow-gun and dart out of her PAK, inserted the dart, aimed at the shoulder, and fired. Thankfully, she did not shoot to kill, only to incapacitate.


	4. Chapter 4 EVEN MOAR STUFF!

Crossover of DOOM

Ch. 4

Johnny let out a little yelp as the dart grazed his shoulder, wincing at the sting. He looked toward where the dart had been fired from and narrowed his eyes in a glare at Arehtia. He didn't know if he was hallucinating, if what had been in the dart was already starting to take effect, or if there really was an alien clinging to the wall. The first two were more likely, but then again, it /was/ Tuesday, it was possible that there was an honest-to-goodness alien stuck to the wall. "Uhh..." he swayed slightly where he stood, the tranquilizer already causing him to slur his words, "Wh-whoowhat arrreee youuu? Areee youuu really analiennn?"

Arethia said nothing, for her mouth was covered by her mask. Instead, she hissed, her left antenna still twitching with annoyedness. Finally, she lowered her mask and said, "Foolish human. Have you no clue to how quickly Irken tranquilizers take affect. In another minute, you will be unconscious." Chuckling to herself, she pulled out a blue-raspberry Brainfreezy and took a long drink.


End file.
